Saturday, December 11, 2010

Do We Continue To Be Ignorant Or Do We Deter?

When I read about the article of Alviss Kong in The Star, I decided to browse further to see who he was in facebook and what was it all about. I also wanted to know what made him committed suicide. From facebook, I found that he had an accumulative number of at least 100,000 people liking his page on different Alviss Kong pages. Even in his personal blog (which has been private by now) has hit 29,000 views.

I know that the world-wide-web's social media has one way or another changed our lifestyles' metaphor. Individuals are more open on their feelings and thoughts in the web and often opting to penned it down on their blog unlike the olden days where we write it down on personal diary. Sometimes, they vent it out on Twitter or Facebook status updates too. So because of this, as a friend, parent, or family members, should we now ought to be a little bit more sensitive towards the action and feelings of our loved ones when they post messages alike Alviss? It is clearly shown that nowadays social media has become one of the preferred channel for individuals to gamble out their last resort before taking dramatic actions against themselves a.k.a. ending their life. It kept me wondering if social media is starting to burst it's bubble by turning the other way round.

This evolution is worrying and I now totally understand why does parents wanting or insisting in one way or another to be friends with their children on their facebook page. This is because, they hope that they could stop their kids in time before it leads to some unfavorable dramatic actions. I don't blame them. I do hope youth will not try to emulate Alviss Kong. If there is something that you could not solve, turn to your trusted friends or family. They will help get you out of it.

If friends of families were to be sensitive enough on the last 45 minutes countdown of Alviss Kong after he posted those messages up on facebook, some sort of actions could have been taken to avoid such saddening incident. But nevertheless, we learn from this lesson. This is the second time people posting shout out in facebook before they take their own life.

Rest In Peace Alviss! I do feel sad reading about your article.

This is the message he posted on his Facebook account:

i love u…i said it i meant it…i’ll love u till the moment i die

devil bin this is the way how i love,perhaps ppl will think it was crazy

i’ve never tried to put down my pride my dignity my ego-ness on my first ex…but u were totally diff,i put down my pride my dignity my every shit

just to beg u….but i failed…as always im just a failure in a relation

but that’s just me,i’ll only do the things which i think its worth…

will i became ur memory forever ? who knows..since u were already special when the first sight i saw u…

perhaps,u’ll just fucking laugh at me…i bet there’s plenty of ppl will laugh too =) but who cares ?

that’s just me…that’s the way i are….

the last thing

i do appreciate everything about us….u were the light in my life..u given me determination for my future…but everything is gone…i don’t blame u actually…

because ~ so just wish u’ll have ya happy life in d future

ILY & IMY ~ sorry that i couldn’t brings u to walk until the end of the day

P/S : Please do not blame her….Im the one who decided this..she’s just the one given me the motivation n courage… my FAMILY,please..i beg of u all,dont ever blame on her…


The photo above was taken by Alviss shortly before he committed suicide. You can feel his sorrow as tears flowed from his eyes.

For those of you who wants to know more, Josh Lim has wrote a summary of the incident and I hope we learn from it. Here goes....

I read some disturbing news in my Facebook feed, and clicked it. In summary, here’s what happened. Most of the official articles are in Chinese, and some people are adding unnecessary details. Here’s just the facts in summary.
Just the facts:
  • A 22 year old (Born 22nd May 1988) , ALVISS KONG (Jiangshi Feng (IT staff) committed suicide by jumping off the 14th floor of Ketumbar Heights, Cheras.
  • Before commiting suicide, he posted a note to his Facebook profile page. Prior to jumping, he took one last photo and even posted a message 45 minutes before.
  • From the note, it can be inferred that he no longer wanted to live after his girlfriend broke up with him.
  • Alviss Kong ’s body damaged a car upon impact, and he lay bleeding until emergency services took him to the hospital.
  • He was pronounced dead at 9AM on the morning of December 10th.
  • He lived on the 5th floor of the same apartment, and has a brother and a sister
  • Prior to jumping off the 14th floor, he went to a tea stall near his apartment.
  • Both Alviss Kong and his girlfriend had blogs.
  • They had been together for 4 months, and this was Alviss’s second, and last relationship.
  • From a source on FB, I found out that Alviss Kong used to work in Berjaya Times Square. He also used to go clubbing a lot, and he liked to wear a plaster on his face as a fashion statement.
There’s a tragic amount of disrespectful comments in the FB page and some of the forums and blogs from “keyboard warriors”, unfortunately. If you’re reading this, please don’t add to it. I thought this tweet summarizes it pretty well:
On Thursday 9th December 2010,  said:
People~ please respect the late alviss kong,4 months doesn’t mean that the love is nt deep,respect by nt saying him dumb or what,n fr u guys who wanna scold or slap the girl,for what?it’s nt even her wrong n we outsiders will nvr know what’s the real prob between them~
Screenshot from Alviss Kong’s blog. It’s closed now, but the Google Cache is available:
It’s quite sad reading about Alviss Kong’s perfect day with her (clubbing, school, etc) especially knowing what happened.
Alviss Kong's Perfect, Unforgettable Day
My thoughts:
This is particularly depressing for me given that Alviss is quite likely someone I have probably met or seen while clubbing. Someone that I have 15 mutual friends with on Facebook. And he’s a blogger. A girl in my Facebook list wrote on her wall about how she was very happy to have been his friend, as she used to club with him and he always had a “cute plaster” on his face, and spend late nights talking on the phone with him and sharing secrets. It’s especially sad knowing that Alviss was a fashionable, good looking guy, had lots of friends and people to talk to (judging from his pics, Facebook profile and blog posts) - but still chose to commit suicide.
I know we’ve all ‘been there’. Where you just want to turn the off switch. It really isn’t the way to go about it.
Please if you’re even thinking of suicide. There’s always a way out. And really. There will always be other girls.
Please do give them a call before you do anything - this is a counselling/suicide prevention hotline.
03-79568144 or 03-79568145
Rest in peace, Alviss.

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